Not for me.

I'm a little behind on posting since I had the flu and was out of commission for a while. Here's another post to make up for it. Plus, I find lists are a great way to procrastinate when I should be writing.

When querying, the standard rejection letter can be boiled down to one line, or three little painful words: Not for me. That's the polite way to decline a query letter. So, in honor of rejection letters, here is ten reasons why someone might find that my writing is not for them.

You might NOT want to read my books if:

1. You expect the guy to be all sappy and romantic or metrosexual
2. You want lengthy descriptions of how people look/how hot they are
3. You don’t like the C-word, F-word, or B-word
4. You don’t like the D-word or any other anatomically exact words used to insult someone
5. You have a problem with age disparity in couples
6. You don’t want any of the characters to die
7. You only like books that end shiny and happy for all the characters
8. You don’t like books with sex/people who talk about sex a lot
9. You want someone to hold your hand and explain every sentence
10. You don’t like books with fantastical elements (vampires, clones, psychics, oh my!)