Hello all. That day so dreaded by singles and so anticipated by the coupled-up is rapidly approaching. In honor of the day of love, I'm giving out free advice on how to woo and court and generally please female-kind. If you're one of the fortunate ladies who has an 'other' for the day in question, but you're not sure he's quite tuned in to the finer points of dating a real live woman, feel free to share this little guide with him by 'accidentally' leaving it on the printer/counter/taped to his steering wheel.
Here are five mishaps to avoid, straight from the vast pool of my cringeworthy moments.
5. If you're dating a girl on Valentine's Day, and you happen to be out of town, don't have your roommate call to wish her happy Valentines Day for you, especially if your roommate is really weird/creepy or has a voice like Kermit the Frog. CALL HER YOURSELF. (Is is, however, okay to have your roommate leave a gift from you on her doorstep without letting her know who left it. She'll be impressed. Really impressed.)